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working out
doing laundry...
what I am doing...
taking pics of me and bug
eating yogurt pie (mmmmm)...
and playing on facebook...
so much for being productive while James was at practice... Oh well...
On another note James captured this video of bug laughing... we think its hilarious. No one else probably will because in all actuality it is just a baby laughing BUT not just any baby let me tell you... This is the sweetest, most adorable, [stinkiest] baby you ever did see... so add that with a deep hearty belly laugh and you get this video...
Ok so I have spent the last 30 mins trying to figure out how to load this 2 minute video and then I realized it would prob be easier if I just told you to go to www.youtube.com/jamesdoezie and click on "Eli Laughing"
Anyways... Not a whole lot else going on here at the Doezie house. James is almost done with school for spring just to start right back up for summer. The good news is though, that he starts Azusa in the fall WHAT A BLESSING!! I start work in a few weeks {insert sigh of self pity here}. As much as I am sad that I have to leave my baby while I go save lives {insert sarcastic chuckle} I have come to realize that 3 days a week really isn't that much. I know it will seem unbearable at first but I feel so blessed to have gotten a job not to mention a job with amazing opportunities.. I think as women in the church and in ministry people feel like they have the right to tell you how you should raise your children and handle your husband (especially since I am so young this makes people feel even more entitled to sharing their opinions). The majority of what I hear is, "How can you leave your baby?" or "I couldn't do it" like the fact that I can makes me a bad mom.
I AM NOT A BAD MOM.. Im not, im not , im not!!!
One thing I have realized in my almost 3 months of mother-dom is that being a stupendous mom may not just look like satying home full time--> don't get me wrong this is my desire--> but could it possibly be that being a good mom and wife could actually look like working?? My husbands burden as the provider isn't lifted but for the first time we will have a plethora of savings, a down payment for a house, and the ability to not live paycheck to paycheck. I trust the Lord will provide whether or not I spend three days a week in the E.R. I guess I just see this as an opportunity... anyways sorry for the rant ... this narrow view that so many women have been trying to push on me and making me feel guilty for not living up to is just heavy on my heart...
{just a disclaimer} I long more than anything to be a stay at home mom. And think that is the hardest most unappreciated job there is. I almost feel in a weird way by going to work I am getting a break. me working is just the situation for now...
{this} to SHALL {pass}
2 comments:
Oh, Kristin. I'm sad that you feel burdened. I think you are doing the right thing for your family if you have your husband's approval and the peace from God. They are the only ones who matter. It is a great blessing that you can make so much in so little time away. I wish I had the ability to do the same. Everything is life is only for a season, so whatever you are doing now is not permanent and change will always come. I think you are incredibly smart and mature and desire God's heart for your family. More than anyone else, God knows that about you and will bless you beyond more you can ask or imagine.
Thanks girl... I really appreciate that. I really am excited to start working... I was just in a funk this morning cause I realized how much I am going to miss my litte stud {and my big stud too} anyways... Your words of encouragement were just what I needed to read! Love ya girl
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